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Reading Out Loud together…to address sexual issues

One of the top exercises I recommend to couples wanting to heal or enrich sexual intimacy in their marriage is to read a book on marital sexuality together. Read the basic instructions  on this page.

The following books are sorted by topic. They are not the only good books for these trouble areas, but are a great start.

Read through the book together and seek the assistance of a qualified counselor when/if you get stuck or have questions.

General Problem Solving

Restoring the Pleasure

by Clifford & Joyce Penner (2016)

An excellent updated guide for couples wanting a step-by-step manual for solving sexual issues in their marriage. Written from a Christian perspective, chapters on arousal, orgasm, and overall satisfaction (among others) help address most sexual problems couples face. Also great for couples seeking to restore from damage.


A Celebration of Sex

by Douglas Rosenau (2002)

A great manual for couples. The first few chapters cover the basics with the balance of the book containing chapters that address how to overcome common sexual problems couples experience.

Sexual Pain

When sex hurts : a woman's guide to banishing sexual pain

by Goldstein, A., Pukall, C. F., & Goldstein, I. (2011)

For any wife experiencing pain during sex. This book will help you diagnose the type and cause of pain and identify potential help. Will also help you find physicians and physical therapists who can help.


Erectile Dysfunction

Coping with Erectile Dysfunction

by Michael Metz & Barry McCarthy (2004)

A guide designed to help couples work together to overcome problems from Erectile Dysfunction


Premature Ejaculation

Coping with Premature Ejaculation

by Michael Metz & Barry McCarthy (2004)

A guide designed to help couples work together to overcome problems from Premature Ejaculation.


Sexual Addiction

Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction

by Mark Laaser (2004)

A must read book if you suspect or know you might be dealing with sexual addiction or sexual compulsivity. Dr. Laaser approaches the subject through his own story and the wisdom of many years helping individuals heal from sexual addiction. Both his pastoral heart and clinical expertise is evident in how he integrates faith, research and experience. Wives should consider his wife’s companion Shattered Vows.


The Porn Trap

by Wendy Maltz (2009)

Maltz does a great job of pointing out both the damage porn does and give initial steps toward recovering (individually and as a couple) from the damage of porn. Not written from a Christian perspective, but an excellent book for those seeking to understand this issue.

Wives of sex addicts

Shattered Vows: Hope and Healing for Women Who Have been Sexually Betrayed

by Debra Laaser (2008)

Using her personal story and the stories of hundreds of wives she has helped, Debra Laaser provides hope and guidance to wives of sex addicted husbands. Read her husbands story in his book (also on this page).

Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal

by Sheri Keffer (2018)

Covering recovery from any spousal sexual wounding including pornography use or infidelity Intimate Deception walks wives through pain into recovery. She discusses the impact to mind, body, and spirit providing practical helps for issues like triggers and guilt.

(Note: Purchasing through the link provided does give BIM a modest referral payment. Thanks for your support.)

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