BIM Articles
Read through all our articles on this page.
Trust Bucket – Rebuilding Trust After an Affair
How do you rebuild trust after an affair? A popular image Dr Mike uses in recovery for many areas of betrayal is his "Trust Bucket". Here he is talking through the image for affair recovery.
Intimacy after Babies – Wire Talk Episode 131
Dr Mike was interviewed for the wildly popular Wire Talk podcast. Wire Talk is the podcast of Birds on a Wire ministry of Karen Stubbs. This group is about serving moms and they do it well. Dr. Mike has been honored to be a speaker at their last couple of SOAR...
Dr. Mike on The Savvy Sauce Podcast
Dr Mike was interviewed for the new podcast The Savvy Sauce. The topic? 10 Common Questions About Sex. I mean, what else would they ask him to talk about? We invite you to check out the podcast. Listen, and let us know what you think. Like it? You might want to...
Sexual Intimacy & Post Affair – Lifegiver Podcast
The Lifegiver podcast aims to be a positive place where military (and first responder) couples can experience positive clinical advice on topics that are unique to their culture as well as high quality uplifting interviews from others who have brought purpose out of...
Pornography and Culture with North Point Care
Dr Mike was interviewed by Ryan Gray for North Point Care on the subject of pornography and culture. While recorded for their care leaders, the video is available on YouTube. Check it out and let us know what you think. Part 2 was focused on Discipline and Discovery.
Your Move
It’s been a long war. In the beginning, daily routines were managed with a fair amount of civility, and the pretenses could be maintained amidst family and friends. Eventually, as things heated up, there no longer existed a moment of peace between them. Now, every...
Who Initiates Sexual Activity in Your Marriage
Who initiates sexual activity in your marriage? Are you ok with how it is? One of the more common areas of sexual dissatisfaction I see in my office is in the area of initiating sexual activity. Complaints of who initiates, how often, and how lovemaking is initiated...
Thoughts on Addiction and Pornography
I have a friend who has a little habit. He begins every morning indulging in its pleasures before heading to work. He jokes he cannot start his day without it. Frequently, he goes to specialty shops to spice things up and experience a little variety. When he is...
The Good News About Marriage
Would your view of marriage change if you knew the following were true? The actual divorce rate has never gotten close to 50 percent. Those who attend church regularly have a significantly lower divorce rate than those who don’t. Most marriages are happy. Simple...
Thanksgiving Ideas
I have great memories of spending the holidays with extended family as a kid. Sitting around two ping-pong tables in my grandparents basement with a host of Uncles, Aunts, and cousins eating lots of great food. If your family get togethers are enjoyable, relax and...
Spiritual Sex
Can sex be a spiritual experience? More often than not, spiritual practices are kept separate from our sexual life. Even when sex is acknowledged as a very good gift from God to be enjoyed in marriage, rarely is sex also seen as a spiritual experience. We...
Are You Cultivating Good Relationship Soil?
For most of human history, we have been personally tied to the land we live on as a source of sustenance. In this modern age, advancements in technology have all but severed this connection. While there is a move back to more locally grown food, chances are the food...
Igniting the Spark of Sexual Passion
They are best friends, great parents, and it is clear they love each other deeply. Still, they are confused at their lack of sexual energy. The infrequent sexual encounters tend to be routine and mechanical, and they find themselves more as good roommates than...
Eros Toward the World
It is not difficult to see the many divisions that exist in the world and the pain caused by such discord. For example, many recent events have reminded us that race relations are not yet healed in our nation. As Christians, we are aware that we can find oneness and...
Empower Your Marriage with Grace
It can be difficult to know how to respond when our spouse’s actions negatively affect us. We want to be gracious people, as God has been gracious to us, but we also don’t want our grace to be taken advantage of and used as an excuse for our spouse to...
When She has the Stronger Drive
This article was written for my friend Shaunti Feldhahn's website - Shaunti.com. It is copied here but I recommend you also view it and the comments on her website. While there, sign up for her email list. - Dr. Mike When She Has the Stronger Sex Drive; Part...
When She Has the Stronger Sex Drive; Part One
This article was written for my friend Shaunti Feldhahn's website - Shaunti.com. It is copied here but I recommend you also view it and the comments on her website. While there, sign up for her email list. - Dr. MikeWhen She Has the Stronger Sex Drive; Part One....
Thoughts on Desire, Sin, Affairs and Being Deceived…
Some thoughts on desire, sin, affairs and being deceived while reading the book of James... About 70% of my therapy load involves post-affair couples. One, or both, of the spouses have had an affair and they are in my office, at least in part, to restore their...